“IT” might be something or nothing at all. “IT” could be one thing or many. “IT” could be simple, and easy to understand, or “IT” could be complex, with various root causes, each with a few potential solutions that would reduce or eliminate “IT” and the impact “IT” has on our life. “IT” could be a person, a place, or a thing, such as an event that invokes an intense adverse emotional reaction such as fear, anger, or worry, which is how you know you have not healed or overcome “IT.”
We all are teachers, students, and/or messengers who can learn from each other. No matter what “IT” might be, as you stand in front of the mirror unafraid to express your truth, you begin the healing process, increasing your strength, courage, and resolve to clear your path so that “IT” no longer negatively impacts your present or future. In school, we are taught the lesson and tested to ensure it was learned. In life, we are tested to learn the lesson. A life lesson will be repeated until it is learned.
Follow your heart but take your brain with you. You can be easily manipulated when you are angered or upset. We need to be mindful of this and ensure we are not inadvertently giving our power to another because of how we react to what they have said or done. Emotional rhetoric, especially that used by your local, state, or federal politician, is used to keep you focused on the left hand while the right is stealing from your pocket. No different than a TV preacher animating your salvation based upon you buying the “holy water” being sold, which they got from the kitchen faucet. This manipulation is intentional to keep you from thinking reasonably and rationally, sending in the money so they can continue to fight windmills on your behalf. When we understand and recognize the method to its madness, we empower ourselves, building up our immunity and defenses, giving us a fighting chance to overcome “IT,” starving it of oxygen or whatever fuel it needs to continue to feed the flame of hate and division.
The first place we need to look is within. Do not look outward to find the cause of the problem because you cannot handle the truth that you, your words, or your actions are the cause. You may not be, but it is better to ask the hard questions yourself first than attempt to deny or ignore what may be living rent-free in our mind, keeping us prisoner, or restricting us from moving forward. The only way to eradicate things that desire to remain in the shadows is to shine a light upon them, and there is no better disinfectant than sunlight. We may also need to consider those closest to us. Some may appear to be in our corner, but their actions might indicate otherwise. We need to know our circle and ensure everyone in our boat is rowing and not drilling holes while we are not looking.
If you cannot find the truth where you are, where else do you expect to find it? Do not compare your life to anyone else’s; we are all spiritual beings on a human journey. No one is on the same path you are; others may walk with you, but no one can walk it for you. Keep the destination in mind, but focus on the next step, not the mountain top. Do your best to enjoy the journey. Being perfect is a mirage, but that is no reason or excuse that justifies not trying to be better today than you were yesterday. You may fall short occasionally; we all do. We are human and allowed to make mistakes. We need to understand, learn, and grow from them, but we cannot make excuses or justifications to avoid the truth. You may not be able to change the world, but that does not mean your world cannot change.
There are two places that everyone should go as often as possible. The first is that place that heals you. The second is that place that inspires you. Neither of these places needs to be a physical location but more of an emotional, mental, or spiritual state of being, even though there may be a physical location that allows you to disconnect from the world for a moment. A key turning point in my life was not wanting to experience the deep regret I felt. To figure out and ensure I changed my present and future, I had to be brutally honest with the reflection in the mirror first before looking at other people, places, or events in my life.
I wish the completion of that process would have been the end of the life lessons I needed to learn, but the universe had other plans. In looking back and writing my story, sharing it with others along the way allowed me to find the words and recognize how I was able to grow as I came to understand the purpose for the pain, if there was one. More importantly, I embedded what I learned into my DNA, healing from things I did not realize were hidden beneath the skin.
Nitki's Dad
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